A night of speaking out against sexual assault
Trigger warning: This article contains topics concerning sexual violence.
The University of Maryland Student Government Association partnered with numerous organizations to hold Reclaim the Red: Moving Forward on Thursday evening, an event geared towards finding ways to prevent sexual misconduct on campus.
SGA had plenty of help and support with co-sponsors including Delta Epsilon Mu, Preventing Sexual Assault, Graduate Student Government, Interfraternity Council, Sigma Psi Zeta, Residence Hall Association, LGBT Equity Center, NAACP and College Democrats.
These organizations decorated tables with pens, giveaways and pamphlets preaching different messages that were all centered around one thing: preventing traumatic situations from happening and offering support to those who have unfortunately endured those situations.
The frequently used word for the evening was consent, and Maya Dayanim, an executive board member for Preventing Sexual Assault, said that “it’s more of a passive choice to not ask for it.”
Dayanim believes that there is a severe lack of knowledge when it comes to the definition of sexual assault and clear consent on college campuses and particulary UMD’s campus.
That’s why PSA, the first and only student-run organization on campus , strives to promote sexual assault prevention and bystander intervention while speaking out against slut-shaming and advocating for survivors.
President Sophia Blake said that the organization has held numerous events to carry out their mission such as the Slut Walk, which was held in October to remind people that it is never the victim’s fault, and Real Talk, an event held the second week in November, which served as a “community-style dicussion” for allies and survivors to talk about sexual assault on campus.
Dayanim said that the objective is “not to vilify, but educate,” and they plan to do just that during their Occupy McKeldin event in April, a 10-hour sit-in on the mall with keynote speakers and workshops.
This event also included speakers from all backgrounds and experiences who all shared the same passion for prevention and awareness.
“We can’t just listen, we can’t just reflect...we need to do something,” said Miss College Park Arcadia Ewell as she spoke to attendees about the importance of sexual assault education.
During her sophomore year in college, her friend became a sexual assault survivor. This was extremely difficult for the survivor but also for Ewell, who became her advocate, and other friends. She described having to make schedules to walk her friend around campus and making sleeping arrangements as the survivor was scared to sleep alone.
As this continued, Ewell began to notice her own personal triggers. She was nervous to share elevators with strangers, and during her internship at the Rape Crisis Intervention Service of Carroll County, a word during a presentation made her feel very uneasy.
She read the definition of stalking and something clicked. After asking her co-workers, she identified that her uneasiness came from being stalked at 14 years of age in middle school. After declining a date invitation, the boy began to follow her to her classes and even went as far as messaging her friends on social media and spreading malicious lies.
Her point was that at 14 years old, she didn’t know any better or realize the severity of the situation which is exactly why her biggest message to the audience included two things: more education on sexual assault and understanding the prevalence of this issue.
Ewell believes that society is failing children by not teaching them the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. She also believes that consent should be taught before kids enter college campuses with a whole new world of experiences and situations.
With these college campuses, comes party culture which often involves alcohol. Grace Fansler, prevention and education program coordinator at the Maryland Coalition Against Sexual Assault, dedicated her presentation to the presence of alcohol in sexual assault situations.
But first, she wanted to set the record straight about sexual assault.
“Sexual assault isn’t really about sex, it’s about control,” Fansler said as she helped the crowd understand that sexual violence is a form of power-based violence where one person uses their power over another to control that person.
“There are consequences to saying no,” Fansler said. She continued to explain that victims do not always feel safe saying no due to consequences used as scare tactics from the perpetrator.
The UMD alum also clarified that sexual violence is an umbrella term which includes incest, child sexual abuse, harassment, stalking, stealing, rape, coercion, sexual assault, trafficking, exploitation and unwanted contact or sexting. Most of these terms were familiar to the audience except for stealthing which involves a party taking the condom off during sex after the other party has consented to sex with a condom.
Fansler made a blanket statement saying that alcohol is never an excuse to take advantage of someone as they cannot clearly consent under the influence.
Unfortunately, people often dismiss survivors’ experiences because alcohol was in the equation. She showed the following tweet in her presentation to demonstrate this exact thinking.
Her presentation concluded with a statement that resonated with the audience: “consent is a continual conversation.” This spoke to necessary boundaries that each party should establish and respect during intimate situations.
As the event continued, there was a banner that read #ReclaimTheRed and event attendees were encouraged to sign their name and pledge to continuing the conversation about sexual assault prevention and awareness.
By the end of the event, the banner was full of student signatures, all pledging that they understand the work required to raise awareness and how to move forward with preventing sexual assault on their campus.